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Success

New Year’s Resolutions Are a Scam

Set Time to Reflect on The Year & Respond for the Next

The Vicious Cycle

Before 2015, I was your typical “New Year’s Resolution” success story: In the Planet Fitness registration line by January 4th, McDonalds by the 10th, and bar by the 15th.  The vicious cycle continued.  “Next Year, I’m going to:”

  • “Go to the Gym 5x / week”
  • “Eat much healthier”
  • “Read more books”
  • “Start something on the side”

Just vague enough to be completely useless!  Everybody has their own list of false, empty, broad, pointless promises that they make each year – myself included.  Half the time they’re discussed half-drunk on New Year’s Eve & forgotten in days, if they even make it overnight.  The other half die by the end of January.  In fact, Forbes shows that less than 25% of people stay committed to goal-hitting after 30 days and less than 8% ever actually achieve their goal.  And I ask – what are the 8% actually hitting?  A single vague “goal” with limited impact or a lifestyle change?  

If we were all still students – and I’d argue we are – we’d all be failing miserably.  But when you keep falling short of personal expectations, doesn’t it actually kind of feel like that?

The bottom line is that the “new year’s resolution” – as we know it – is a scam.  Filled with empty hope, no plan & little, if any success.  Rather than keeping a glass half empty approach to daily living & lifelong betterment, here are some thoughts on how to make it a “new year’s revolution” and hit more goals than you ever thought possible.

The Day My Mindset Changed

On December 29th, 2015 I sent an email to some friends with the subject line “Books”.  At the time, I didn’t even realize I was suffering from the bigger picture consequences of poor mindset, false hope and no plan of attack in life.  I was all over the place – and simply looking to figure out how to get more stuff done.  More specifically, how do I manage time, use to-do lists effectively & prioritize work?  

Like everybody, I was knee deep in the “social dilemma”, the connected world or what I’ll call “the notification era.”  Basically, I was unable to stay focused on any one thing long enough to actually get anything materially good, done – without moving on to some shiny, temporary distraction.  Sure, I was “successful” in other people’s terms, by not my own.  I wasn’t happy and wasn’t producing anything that I REALLY wanted.  And don’t ask me what I wanted because I didn’t have a clue.  All I knew is that I needed to change my mindset and learn how to accomplish & follow through on ANYTHING, big or small, that I put in front of myself. I no longer wanted to be a slave to the world’s daily offerings. 

So I got some good responses to the note (thanks Reed!).  A book about getting things done called – well – none other than “Getting Things Done.”  Go figure (and a great read)!  I also heard about success mentor Darren Hardy’s “DarrenDaily” – and that’s when my life changed.    

Make a Business Plan for Your Life

In business, people & companies put together quarterly business reviews, business plans, investor presentations, etc.  We build proposals & sales / presentations.  When it comes to our personal lives, however, we do nothing.  How long would you say you spend building good, sustainable, printable material for yourself, your life and YOUR quarter?  It’s time to reconsider what carries more value – your work or your life.  

Try taking a more pragmatic, formal approach to improving yourself, and not just your muscle definition.  I promise you can completely overhaul every aspect of your life from mind/body/soul to family/work/finances.  At the end of the day, what else really matters?  

Take it from somebody who’s seen, frankly, a life transformation & overhaul in the past several years. Directionless & unfulfilled to happy as a clam. So here’s a blueprint to straightening things out in the new year.  All it takes is a few hours, a bit of commitment, some good music – and you’ll have an actionable plan to set the tone for what’s next.

  1. Make Up Your Mind – COVID or No COVID, you only live once.  Decide that NOW is the time to change.  This isn’t revolutionary.  People just aren’t doing it and believe they can’t control or change it.
  2. Make a Reservation – Pick a day over the holiday break when you can give yourself at least a few hours to grab a notebook & do some personal brainstorming.  Bring your favorite playlist, beer / coffee, a dog – whatever floats your boat.  
  3. Find a Friend – If possible, grab a partner, spouse or friend.  You can do it yourself, but why not hold each other accountable & share in the successes together?
  4. Be vulnerable & reflect on last year! – I mean, just start. Pick up some paper & ink. Make a list for each category of wins (i.e. achievements/events, decisions, improvements, people, gratitude) and losses (i.e. events, decisions, missteps, bad habits).  Come up with your own ideas/lists across ALL facets of life.  Be deadly honest with yourself.  Nobody asked you to post this on TikTok.
  5. The Art of the Possible – Now is the fun part. Be creative, think big, but think realistically. Make a list of 3 goals for each facet of life. I’ve typically included work, financial, family, health, mental, lifestyle, social and spiritual.  This year I’m adding digital.  Highlight your top 3 & top 10 goals overall.  This is where you should be spending your cycles… 
  6. Yes, Use a Printer – I’d argue this is more important than anything you’ll do at work in a whole year.  You’re not presenting it to others, you’re presenting it to yourself.  At the very least, type & print your list of goals (calling out the top 3/10).  As a bonus, put it on a wall that you’ll see throughout the year. I even created a “wallet” version.
  7. Relax & Celebrate! – Now go grab a drink, a pizza, run around naked for all I care.  Whatever works for you. You’ve just taken this time out for yourself, and not your boss or anybody else.  It’s a big step & you should be proud.
  8. Create an Action Plan – If you’ve done any of the above, I guarantee a big year.  But if you really want to make it happen, come up with a process that works for you to actually plan & attack each of the big goals – rinsing & repeating over the course of the year.

Go Get ‘Em

Look, we’ve all had a wacky year.  No doubt, at some level, we’ve all struggled with a new set of challenges this year both physically and mentally. But there are positives in everything.  As you settle into this exercise, make sure you look for those needles in a haystack, breakthroughs, and moments that mattered.  Acknowledge the shortfalls.  But take the time.  I guarantee – it will be rewarding.  

Rather than buying new year’s bandaids with a 1-week lifespan, let’s consider how to completely overhaul our happiness, success & balance in a way that’s irreversible, fulfilling, and free.   

I reiterate.  If we owe our managers & our customers an update – shouldn’t we owe ourselves the same thing?  

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I have to reinforce credit & gratitude to the teachings & material of Darren Hardy, his 2-minute video “DarrenDaily” and his annual goal-setting book “Living Your Best Year Ever”.  I wouldn’t be where I am in my success, happiness or balance journey without it.  My approach to every day, week, month & year has tweaked greatly since 2015, but big things to Darren for providing the much needed inspiration & platform for success.